Why are all black people so quick ?

Outside a massage parlour, there is a board that reads
"I only massage those who do not massage themselves."

Reading the above statement, does the masseur massage himself?

Do you know who was buried in John's tomb?

I am a type of word that is spelt incorrectly or used differently, on purpose for humour. What am I?
Hint 1: You can find me in a joke.
Hint 2: I am a play on words.

Can you count the number of seconds in a year?

Clue: You need to bother about calculation.

Look at me. I can bring a smile to your face, A tear to your eye, Or even a thought to your mind. But, I can't be seen. What am I?

There is a rock group of four men that do not sing. Name It?

The barber of Town shaves all men living in the town. No man living in the town is allowed to shave himself. The barber lives in that town. Who then shaves the barber of the town?

Why do you find that most of the buildings are deprived of the 13th floor?

What kind of tree can you carry in your hand?