People put me on the table and cut me but do not eat me. What am I?

Outside a massage parlour, there is a board that reads
"I only massage those who do not massage themselves."

Reading the above statement, does the masseur massage himself?

I am a word that begins with the letter “i.” If you add the letter “a” to me, I become a new word with a different meaning, but that sounds exactly the same. What word am I?

What does below rebus means ?

What goes through cities and fields, but never moves?

A girl was sitting in her hotel room when she heard a knock on the door. She opened the door and found that a man was standing outside.
The man said, "Oh! I am really sorry, I thought this was my room."
He then walked through the corridor to the elevator. The girl did not know the man. She closed her door and called security asking them to apprehend the man.
What made her suspicious of that man? He might have been genuinely mistaken.

There are are five things wrong with this sentence; only geniuses will be able to to spot all of the mitstakes

I am the first thing you need while camping.
I am always with the person named Marcos Valencia and Carrick.
But Pogba Zlatan and Rooney think I am wasteful and do not need me.
I am the second to the last thing to add when you are making a patch.

What am I?

I have two coins.
* One of the coins is a faulty coin having a tail on both sides of it.
* The other coin is a perfect coin (heads on side and tail on other).

I blindfold myself and pick a coin and put the coin on the table. The face of the coin towards the sky is the tail.

What is the probability that another side is also tail?

1. What does:
TIM JOB
represent?

2. What does:
MO_ _
represent?