81 x 9 = 801. What must you do to make the this equation true?

Outside a massage parlour, there is a board that reads
"I only massage those who do not massage themselves."

Reading the above statement, does the masseur massage himself?

John left on a horse on Thursday , was gone for two days, and came back on Thursday after completing his work. How did that happen?

What does the rebus below mean?

TEN BADTION

What part of the chicken has the most feathers?

I am a type of room you cannot enter or leave. Raised from the ground below, I could be poisonous or a delicious treat. What am I?

On the dull night when the blonde was dozing, she heard an odd clamour and she saw that there was a bizarre man with a gun simply outside her home. So she raced to the telephone to call the police, however, she can't dial 911. Why?

Take number 1000 and then add 20 to it.
Now add 1000 one more time.
Now add 30.
Now add 1000 one more time.
Now add 40.
Now add 1000 one more time.
Now add 10.

What is the total?

What has a ring but no finger?

How can you drop a raw egg from a height onto a concrete floor without cracking it?