I have branches, but no fruit, trunk or leaves. What am I?

I am a type of word that is spelt incorrectly or used differently, on purpose for humour. What am I?
Hint 1: You can find me in a joke.
Hint 2: I am a play on words.

In a family supper, a grandfather, a grandmother, two fathers, two mothers, four children, three grandchildren, one brother, two sisters, two sons, two daughters, one daughter-in-law, and one mother-in-law need to sit at a table.

There are only seven chairs available at the place. How many more chairs do they have to borrow so that everyone can sit down together for the suppers if everybody requires a separate chair?

A man is surviving on an island along with his friend. They have been starving for four days for food. Suddenly, they find a fisherman. The friend goes with the fisherman in order to catch the fish (if they can find any).

The fisherman returns after some time but he is alone and has some salmon that he had prepared. When asked, the fisherman tells him that his best friend fell off the boat and drowned in the water. Starving for so long, he eats the meal while crying for his friend.

After being rescued, he goes to a diner and orders salmon. When he eats his meal, he jumps and commits suicide. Why did he do it?

The first person saw the bridge step on it and crossed,
the second person saw the bridge did not step on it but crossed,
the third person did not see the bridge did not step on it but crossed.
Who are these people?

Can you name some countries which do not have the alphabet 'A' in them?

I am a five-letter word under you,
Remove the first letter and I am above you,
Remove the second as well and I am around you.

Who am I?

While house hunting in London, I came across a very good leasehold property Discussing the lease the landlady told me:

'The property was originally on a 99 years lease and two-thirds of the time passed is equal to four-fifths of the time to come. Now work it out for yourself and see how many years are to go!

I can sizzle like bacon,
I am made with an egg,
I have plenty of backbone, but lack a good leg,
I peel layers like onions, but still remain whole,
I can be long, like a flagpole, yet fit in a hole.

Quickly Solve this riddle

7 - 4 + 3 * 0 + 1 = ?