Man in the Hotel

There was a man he lives in a hotel each morning he presses the first floor button each evening if there is a person in the elevator he asks him to press the 10 floor button if there is no one in the elevator he takes the stairs why.




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A man was telling some of his war stories to his grandchildren.
"When the World War I was on the verge of end, I was awarded for my bravery for I had saved a group of my men." He coughed and then added, "When we were fighting in northern France, an enemy soldier threw a grenade at us. Before it could explode, I picked it up and threw it away. For my act of bravery, right before the war ended, A General gave me a sword engraved with the words "Awarded for Display of Bravery and Heroism in World War 1"."

Hearing this, one of the grandson spoke up. "Grandpa, this is not a true story. It can"t be true!"

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Thomas has missed an excessive number of days of school, so he must meet with Principal Davis. Mr. Davis asks him "Why on Earth have you missed so many days?" Thomas replies "There just isn't enough time for school. I need 8 hours of sleep a day, which adds up to about 122 days a year. Weekends off is 104 days a year. Summer vacation is about 60 days. If I spend about an hour on each meal, that's 3 hours a day or 45 days a year. I need at least 2 hours of exercise and relaxation time each day to stay physically and mentally fit, adding another 30 days. Add all of that up and you get about 361 days. That only leaves 4 days for school." The principal knows Thomas is full of it, but can't figure out why. Where is Thomas going wrong?

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If you drop me I’m sure to crack, but give me a smile and I’ll always smile back. What am I?

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What does this Rebus Picture mean?

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