The day after tomorrow will be three days before Tuesday. Can you find out what is today?

A charming young lady was approached by a kind looking old woman in a restaurant. The old woman said to her, 'You look exactly like my younger daughter. Sadly she passed away a couple of months back. Could you do me a favor and say 'Goodbye, mother' with a kind smile on your face when I leave?

The young lady agreed for the same and said, 'Goodbye, mother' when the old woman left. Soon after, she got the most disengaging shock of her life.

Can you guess what the shock was?

The world's largest Thanksgiving turkey was on display at a fair. Everyone was admiring it when suddenly a woman ran up and shot the turkey and left. Everyone knew her yet nobody made any attempts to stop or report her. Why?

It's a 7-letter word.
If we remove 1 letter from it, it remains the same.
If we remove 2 letters from it, it remains the same.
If we remove 3 letters from it, it remains the same.
If we remove all the letters from it, still it remains the same.
What is it?

Find a 9-digit number, which you will gradually round off starting with units, then tenth, hundred etc., until you get to the last numeral, which you do not round off. The rounding alternates (up, down, up ...). After rounding off 8 times, the final number is 500000000. The original number is commensurable by 6 and 7, all the numbers from 1 to 9 are used, and after rounding four times the sum of the not rounded numerals equals 24.

What demands an answer, but asks no questions

What kind of storm is always in a rush?

John, Jack and Jill are in a desert. John doesn't like Jill and hence decides to murder him. He poisons the water supply of Jill. Since it is a desert area, Jill must drink or he will die of thirst.

Jack does not know of the actions of John and also decides to murder Jill. To succeed in his ill motives, he removes the water supply of Jill so he dies of thirst.

Jill dies due to thirst. Who murdered Jill?

A man is sitting in a pub feeling rather poor. He sees that the man next to him is extremely rich. He turns to the rich man and says to him, 'I have an amazing talent; I know almost every song that has ever existed.'
The rich man laughs.
The poor man says, 'I am willing to bet you all the money you have in your wallet that I can sing a genuine song with a lady's name of your choice in it.'
The rich man laughs again and says, 'OK, how about my daughter's name, Joanna Armstrong-Miller?'
The rich man goes home poor. The poor man goes home rich.

What song did he sing? A man is sitting in a pub feeling rather poor. He sees the man next to him pull a wad of £50 notes out of his wallet. He turns to the rich man and says to him, 'I have an amazing talent; I know almost every song that has ever existed.' The rich man laughs. The poor man says, 'I am willing to bet you all the money you have in your wallet that I can sing a genuine song with a lady's name of your choice in it.' The rich man laughs again and says, 'OK, how about my daughter's name, Joanna Armstrong-Miller?' The rich man goes home poor. The poor man goes home rich. What song did he sing?

What does the below mathematical rebus mean?