Decode this picture on T-Shirt and tell what it says ?

Why blonde cannot dial 911?

Irene killed hundreds of people mercilessly and yet the police were not able to put her behind the bars. Why?

What is in seasons, seconds, centuries and minutes but not in decades, years or days?

Which number should replace the question mark?

It's a test that will check your IQ.

Suppose you have one 11 minute hourglass and one 13 minute hourglass.

Can you measure exactly fifteen minutes using them ?

An infinite number of mathematicians are standing behind a bar. The first asks the barman for half a pint of beer, the second for a quarter pint, the third an eighth, and so on. How many pints of beer will the barman need to fulfill all mathematicians' wishes?

A blonde put eyeliner on her head. Why?

In a rainy season, one day 3 huge ladies walked under a normal-sized umbrella.
The umbrella is not huge enough to accommodate all 3 ladies yet not a single lady got wet. Why?

John, Jack and Jill are in a desert. John doesn't like Jill and hence decides to murder him. He poisons the water supply of Jill. Since it is a desert area, Jill must drink or he will die of thirst.

Jack does not know of the actions of John and also decides to murder Jill. To succeed in his ill motives, he removes the water supply of Jill so he dies of thirst.

Jill dies due to thirst. Who murdered Jill?