Can you decipher the following common phrase?

T M C
A U O
H S M
W T E

A father is locked up in jail. His wife has gone bankrupt. Their male child has to sell his hotel in order to gain some money. Yet their girl child does not care and is quite happy.

How can someone be so rude?

You walk into a creepy house by yourself. There is no electricity, plumbing, or ventilation. Inside you notice 3 doors with numbers on them. Once you open the doors you will die a particular way. Door No.1 You’ll be eaten by a lion who is hungry. Door No.2 You’ll be stabbed to death. Door No.3 There is an electric chair waiting for you. Which door do you pick?

Which part of London exists in France as well ?

Can you find the thief by just looking at the picture below?

Two guards were on duty outside a barracks. One faced up the road to watch for anyone approaching from the North. The other looked down the road to see if anyone approached from the South. Suddenly one of them said to the other, "Why are you smiling?"

How did he know his companion was smiling?

Using the clues below, what four numbers am I thinking of?

The sum of all the numbers is 31.
One number is odd.
The highest number minus the lowest number is 7.
If you subtract the middle two numbers, it equals two.
There are no duplicate numbers.

A train full of passengers goes through a tunnel. When the train comes out from the other end, there is no single person on the train.

How did it happen?

I am a type of word that is spelt incorrectly or used differently, on purpose for humour. What am I?
Hint 1: You can find me in a joke.
Hint 2: I am a play on words.

Two boys wish to cross a river. The only way to get to the other side is by boat, but that boat can only take one boy at a time. The boat cannot return on its own, there are no ropes or similar tricks, yet both boys manage to cross using the boat.

How?