Who is generally closer to the kids, mom or dad?

(it's a funny riddle)

Can you write down eight eights so that they add up to one thousand?

A man is found hanging dead from the ceiling of a room. The room’s dimensions are 15 x 15 x 15. The man is only 6ft tall and the rope was only 2ft long. There are no windows and only one door to the room. The door is bolted shut from the inside, and a puddle of water is under the man. How did he kill himself?

Why is 6 afraid of 7?

I am a mother. However, I never give birth.

I am a father. However, I never nurse my children.

Wandering is not possible for me, but standing still happens occurs rarely.

Who am I?

The person who makes it has no need for it; the person who buys it has no use for it. The person who uses it can neither see nor feel it. What is it?

Today is a very icy and cold morning in Newcastle. Mr Shearer, an office bus driver arrived to pick up the employees from the last stop. Shearer suddenly remembers that he needs to pick a newly joined 4miles to the north. Mr Shearer lost his direction compass, a few minutes later Shearer is able to figure that he is moving in the correct direction i.e. north. How did Shearer know that he is moving in the correct direction?

On my way to St. Ives I saw a man with 7 wives. Each wife had 7 sacks. Each sack had 7 cats. Each cat had 7 kittens. Kittens, cats, sacks, wives. How many were going to St. Ives?

A man is walking down a road with a basket of eggs. As he
is walking he meets someone who buys one-half of his eggs
plus one-half of an egg.
He walks a little further and meets another person who buys
one-half of his eggs plus one-half of an egg.
After proceeding further he meets another person who buys
one-half of his eggs plus one half an egg. At this point, he
has sold all of his eggs, and he never broke an egg.
How many eggs did the man have to start with?

What two things can you never eat for breakfast?