I am sometimes honest
Sometimes dishonest
I can be sweet and also bitter
I can hurt you real bad and
also make u smile and blush ☺️
What am I?

A man who was outside in the rain without an umbrella or hat didn’t get a single hair on his head wet. Why?

Three men in a cafe order a meal the total cost of which is $15. They each contribute $5. The waiter takes the money to the chef who recognises the three as friends and asks the waiter to return $5 to the men.

The waiter is not only poor at mathematics but dishonest and instead of going to the trouble of splitting the $5 between the three he simply gives them $1 each and pockets the remaining $2 for himself.

Now, each of the men effectively paid $4, the total paid is therefore $12. Add the $2 in the waiters pocket and this comes to $14. Where has the other $1 gone from the original $15?

Jack have ten pairs of black socks, eight pairs of white socks and seven pairs of green socks. Everything is mixed in a draw. As there is no light he were not able to identify the colour of the socks. How many of the socks did he want to take to match one pair

John left on a horse on Thursday , was gone for two days, and came back on Thursday after completing his work. How did that happen?

A Miser man decided to go on a vacation for a month. He goes to the bank and asks for a trip loan of $500. The bank officer asks the man that the loan can only be approved when he mortgage some valuable thing at the bank. Miser man mortgages his only car whose worth was a whopping $80000. The Bank officer laughed at him and approve the loan instantly. After vacation when the miser man returns, the bank officer asked him "Are you an idiot, why is your mortgage such an expensive car for such a short loan?".

Miser man replied with some reason and the bank officer agreed that the miser man is actually not an idiot.

What did miser man reply to the bank loan officer?.

John went to buy some expensive, foreign chocolates. He only had Rs 100 with him. When he reached the shop, he got out and know that on those chocolates, there was a 15% import duty and 5% VAT.

How much worth chocolate should he buy so that he can accommodate it in Rs 100?

John needs to purchase 100 chocolates from three different shops and he has exactly 100 rupees to do that which he must spend entirely. He must buy at least 1 Chocolate from each shop.

The first shop is selling each chocolate at 5 paise, the second is selling at 1 rupee and the third is selling at 5 rupees.

How many chocolates should he buy from each shop?

While preparing the table for dinner, wife came up with an idea to tease his mathematician husband. She asked her husband to pick nine toothpicks and make ten without breaking any toothpick.

The husband was also smart and did it within seconds. How ?

Lifeless eyes on my smiling face and watch your child's sleeping place. In their dreams they hold me tight. What am I?