John went to a parrot shop in Mexico, and the parrot owner told him that his parrot is so unique that he repeats everything he hears. John got excited and immediately bought the parrot. John went home and spoke many words, but the parrot does not repeat anything.
He went again to the parrot shop and complaint to the shopkeeper, but the shopkeeper never lied. Explain?

Thomas has missed an excessive number of days of school, so he must meet with Principal Davis. Mr. Davis asks him "Why on Earth have you missed so many days?" Thomas replies "There just isn't enough time for school. I need 8 hours of sleep a day, which adds up to about 122 days a year. Weekends off is 104 days a year. Summer vacation is about 60 days. If I spend about an hour on each meal, that's 3 hours a day or 45 days a year. I need at least 2 hours of exercise and relaxation time each day to stay physically and mentally fit, adding another 30 days. Add all of that up and you get about 361 days. That only leaves 4 days for school." The principal knows Thomas is full of it, but can't figure out why. Where is Thomas going wrong?

Can you decipher the following common phrase?

T M C
A U O
H S M
W T E

Irene killed hundreds of people mercilessly and yet the police were not able to put her behind the bars. Why?

I am a type of word that is spelt incorrectly or used differently, on purpose for humour. What am I?
Hint 1: You can find me in a joke.
Hint 2: I am a play on words.

What has lots of eyes, but can’t see?

When I got four, I have it none.
When I got two, I have it some.
When I got none, I have it all.

What is it?

Name a key which is hardest to turn.

Can you identify the hidden rebus in the image below?

I am lying and I always lie. Tell me whether I am lying or telling the truth.