Can you decipher the following common phrase?

T M C
A U O
H S M
W T E

On the dull night when the blonde was dozing, she heard an odd clamour and she saw that there was a bizarre man with a gun simply outside her home. So she raced to the telephone to call the police, however, she can't dial 911. Why?

I have a big mouth and I am also quite loud! I am NOT a gossip but I do get involved with everyone's dirty business.

Two men play a dice game involving roll of two standard dice. Man X says that a 12 will be rolled first. Man Y says that two consecutive 7s will be rolled first. The men keep rolling until one of them wins.

What is the probability that X will win ?

When you say goodbye, I am what you need to tie.
I come as a couple and go wherever you run.
Who am I?

When does a USA Potato change its nationality?

You can hear me, but you can't touch or see me.

What am I?

A woman is sitting in her hotel room and hears a knock at the door. She opens the door to see a man whom she’s never met before. He says, “I’m sorry, I have made a mistake, I thought this was my room.” He then goes down the corridor and into the elevator. The woman goes back into her room and calls security. What made the woman so suspicious of the man?

What number when divided in half becomes zero?

If six children and two dogs were under an umbrella, how come none of them got wet?