People put me on the table and cut me but do not eat me. What am I?

A man is sitting in a bar when a rich man sits next to him. He turns to the rich man and says, “Did you know I know almost every song that has ever existed?”

The rich man laughs. The man then says, “I bet you all the money you have in your wallet that I can sing a genuine song with a lady’s name of your choice in it. The rich man laughs again and says, “OK, how about my daughter’s name, Jamie Armstrong-Miller?” Minutes later, the man collects his cash and the rich man goes home cashless. What song did the man sing?

I am never scared but became petrified and can’t live in a house but would die to make one. What am I?

Who has married many women but was never married?

I sleep during the day and fly at night, but I have no feathers to aid my flight. What am I?

A Japanese ship was en route to a mission on foreign seas. The captain of the ship felt tired and thought of taking a bath. He went for taking the shower and removed his diamond ring and Rolex and kept them on the table. When he returned after taking the bath, he found that the ring and watch were stolen.

He called the five members of the crew whom he suspected and asked them what they were doing for the last 15 minutes.

The Italian cook (with a butcher knife in hand): I was in the fridge room getting meat for cooking.

The British Engineer (with a high beam torch in hand): I was working on a generator engine.

The Pakistani seaman: I was on the mast correcting the flag which was upside down by mistake.

The Indian Radio officer: I was trying to make a contact with the company to inform them about our position.

The American navigation officer: I am on night watch, so I was sleeping in my cabin.

Upon listening to them, the captain caught the lying member. Who do you think stole the valuables?

I have a five and a three-gallon jar. Assuming there is an infinite supply of water, how can I measure one-gallon water?

Decode below rebus
D
N
A
T
S , D

There is a place where if I stand up straight, I will still be considered sideways.

An octopus has 8 legs. A hippogriff has 6 legs and 2 pairs of wings. A sphinx has 6 legs and one pair of wings. Now we have all 3 kinds and a total of 18 insects in a cage. We have a total of 118 legs and 20 pairs of wings. How many insects do we have of each kind?